Happy New Year!

Hope everyone has a wonderful night and a great start to 2008!

xoxo

The Single Girl

Ain't this life so sweet

As I finished washing the dishes at the OR’s place as this song came on;



then the doorbell rang. It was the SSM. He greeted me with a kiss and a huge hug.

I can tell you how we spent our day, lounging around listening to music, going for lunch, snuggling and having a pint together at the airport before saying goodbye with a spin and a kiss at airport security. I can say without question that we had an amazing day and that we will have a few more when he comes here in a few weeks. What I can’t tell you what is going on as I don’t really know myself, but something seems to have changed between us. This new found – whatever – may not last but I am going to enjoy for as long as a can.

The Single Girl

Check the O.R.

Spending time in a city other than your own is always fun. Spending time with someone you know and love in that city is even better. I know I said I was seeing the SSM but what I forgot to mention is that my old roomie (OR) and her boyfriend live in that very same city! And I spent the first day of my post family holiday excursion with them.

When I arrived I got the 50cent tour of the apartment, dropped my bags and promptly went for brunch, with beer! Then the two of us hit the streets to shop for shoes, clothes and whatever else struck our fancy. We both ended up with fabulous handbags and lots of potential shoe buys. Then we went to a fabulous pizza place and had vegan pizza – mmmm fake cheeeese. Then home to bake some cookies drink some wine and watch a little show called Entourage.

Back when I lived with the OR (and roomie funnily enough) we became huge fans of a little show called Sex and the City and would stay up until midnight every Friday night to watch it often with a small group including OQB. So it was wonderfully reminiscent when we sat down in front of the television to watch the first episode of the first season of Entourage that her brother had given her. It was so great that we watched four episodes in a row as we drank our wine. And when they left in the morning to go to the centre of the universe, I watched the next four episodes.

Truly it was a fabulous day. Thanks for the post family holiday fun OR.

Check the OR … you like it so far
Check the OR, you like it so far
Check the OR, you like it so far
Check the OR, you like it so far

Check the OR, you love the OR.*

* Check the O.R. by Organized Rhyme.

That’s right, I am old skool beeoch.

The Single Girl

Tourist Season

I am about to spend the day with the SSM in his new city. I wasn’t going to tell him that I was coming, but Fireboy said that I should, and made me feel like I was being a bit of a jerk for not tell him, so I did. He is going to show me around for the day and he is getting me a free ride to the airport, so it can’t be all bad.

This might be a bad idea, I will let you all know soon.

Happy belated Christmas for those that celebrate it and a happy early New Year.

TSG

More fun!

alright, I must admit I am not in a mood to write this week but I am in the mood to post, so I hope you all enjoy this as much as I did. I also wanted to see if I could figure out how to put a youtube video here.




Yeah Me!

Love it!

Yeah ....






The is from one of my favourite comics xkcd. Like what you see, check out http://xkcd.com/

Hope everyone is enjoying some holiday cheer!

TSG

Sometimes I wonder ...

Where does the good go?



Where do you go with your broken heart in tow
What do you do with the left over you
And how do you know, when to let go
Where does the good go, where does the good go
Look me in the eye and tell me you don't find me attractive
Look me in the heart and tell me you won't go
Look me in the eye and promise no love's like our love
Look me in the heart and unbreak broken, it won't happen
It's love that leaves and breaks the seal of always thinking you would be
Real, happy and healthy, strong and calm, where does the good go

Where does the good go

Where do you go when you're in love and the world knows
How do you live so happily while I am sad and broken down
What do you say it's up for grabs now that you're on your way down
Where does the good go, where does the good go

An Ideal Saturday

Getting back into my life routine has it’s ups and downs but yesterday I was reintroduced to Saturdays with the roommates. We started the day by going for brunch with a friend and then to the mall for some light shopping and to the market for fresh veggies and cheese curds (mmm curds). Then off to the micro brewery for a pint to celebrate our hard work so far today and then home for dinner and a bottle of wine.

It doesn’t get much better than that.

BAD

I am getting a new computer at work so I have to go through the one I have now and clean up all my files i.e. my personal files on the work computer. In the process I have come across a few IM conversations with my friend J about the SSM over the course of the summer. It is both fascinating and heart breaking to read.

As early as July I knew I was falling for this guy, and as early as July I knew it wasn’t going to work out. So did J, and very clearly told me in every conversation that I needed to tell him how I felt and walk away before I got too hurt. Well, we know that I didn’t talk to him until the very end of the summer. And even then I just told him how I felt I didn’t really walk away. I think I am almost ready to walk away – but more on that another day.

Reading the IM chats makes me wish I did a better job of logging our summer adventures here on the blog. Then again it would just be one more thing read and obsess over. More importantly OQB would never rise the to ranks of most blogged about if I did that ;)

I think I need to have lunch with Awesome. No matter what is going on in my life, his life is invariably messier than mine. It is good for a little perspective and it is almost always funny – not funny ha ha, but funny living nightmare.

The Single Girl

The Unholy Pentagon

It has come to my attention that I currently have five boyfriends – GB,OQB, Fireboy, Awesome, and the SSM. Each one of them hold a special place in my heart and my life. This might be oversimplified, but here is what each one of them bring to my life currently.

GB is my primary boyfriend (so to speak). He is my roommate and friend and we share everything from our daily minutia to our long term life plans.

OQB is my fabulous boyfriend. He and I share a party lifestyle and spend time dancing, talking about relationships and generally condemning the world to be less fabulous than we are.

Frieboy is my spiritual boyfriend. He and I spend our time together talking about how we feel and what we are trying to do with our lives and how, we can improve ourselves and our relationships.

Awesome is my bad boy boyfriend. Awesome and I spend our time talking about conspiracy theories, how the world sucks and everyone is out to get him and that there is no point in trying because it is all going to end in shit anyway.

The SSM is my ex boyfriend. He is the man who is teaching me what I want and deserve from a romantic partner.

Together they create my unholy pentagon.

Having realized this I think it is time to lose one or two of the boyfriends before a man in a red suit shows up at my door offering me a plumb job in hell.

TSG

Boys Are Smelly

Let's throw rocks at them!

http://www.davidandgoliathtees.com/games/throwrocks.html

Getting right to the heart of the matter

Taken from an IM conversation

Awesome: Well … I should go. I’m effing hungry.

TSG: K. You going to be okay?

Awesome: Yeah.

TSG: K. Go eat. I will talk to you tomorrow most likely. Before you go … tell me that it is a bad idea to talk to the SSM

Awesome: It is a bad idea to talk to the SSM.

Awesome: He wears silly pants.

I can’t decide if this healthy

Earlier this week when Awesome and I were having lunch he informed me that we (He and I) should do one of those singles dating things.

“What are you talking about?” I inquired.
“You know one of those events where there are a bunch of single people in a room having drinks and getting to know each other. There is one this Thursday.”
“Ummm … I’m not really sure about that.”
“Yeah Thursday is too soon, but we should totally do it.”
“Yeah, Thursday is too soon, but that isn’t my only concern. Did you forget that I am six years older than you? Generally, these things have age groups put together. Check the appropriate age box. I have a feeling we wouldn’t be in the same dating box … so to speak.”
“Listen, let me worry about what box I go into …”
“Yeah, I will. And eww ... Why do I have a feeling this isn’t a good idea.”
“What are you talking about. This is a great idea!”
“I will think about it.”
“We are totally going to do this.”

So now I am left wondering, is our ability to go on a singles excursion where we look for possible mates a sign of a very healthy friendship, or SO healthy that it is unhealthy. I can’t tell anymore.

Either way I think it is good that I am willing to entertain going on a date, even if Awesome is there.

The Single Girl

My Paranoia

I started this blog over a year ago and a few times over that year I have been told that people I know read the blog. That is fine most of the time until you are in a social situation and someone you know brings up the waxing and then you question sharing your intimate moments with friends and strangers.

Right now I know most of my readers wither personally or through their own blogs. Thanks to my handy dandy site meter I know where you all come and when you are reading and when you are commenting. But lately, there have been some new folks stopping by (which I love, I really do) but it makes me nervous that the wrong people might end up finding the site.

(Somewhere on the other side of the Country The Lady has just rolled her eyes and said “duh? And I told you so” to her computer screen.)

Why am I telling you … well someday, I may have to change this site, make it private, or delete it all together, because, I realize anonymity doesn’t last forever, but I am still trying.

So please if you see me and you think you know this is my blog … pretend you don’t … if not for me then for the sake of the blog.

Thanks,

The Slightly Neurotic and Paranoid – Single Girl

Who Knew That is What I Needed?

One of the best nights out I have had in weeks, turned out to be a night in with OQB last week. I was staying at his place one night while in the centre of the universe and when we were making a plan for the evening he asked what I wanted to do as it was a Friday night. “Don’t really care, what do you want to do?” I said thinking we would hit a bar or two, but he surprised me by saying “I don’t care as long as we don’t go out.”

So we stayed in, gossiped, drank a bottle of wine, contemplated drinking a second and played a game of scrabble. Not what I expected from my OQB, but truly what I needed and wanted. Part of our gossiping circled around this blog actually … and a post I made a few days early called Vaguely Messy.

After I posted Vaguely Messy, one of my regular readers and an interesting blogger in his own right Cap. posted a comment. I read it accepted it and responded. Ten minutes later, another comment – at this point he has made my day – and another response from me. Then, much to my surprise he gave me his email so we sent a few emails about West Coast Swing – a topic he is very passionate about. Now, don’t get any ideas readers, it was all just innocent flirtation and chat, but again, it was what I needed and wanted – attention from someone other than the messy boys in my life.

So thanks Cap and OQB for making this single girl’s week last week. You both rock.

TSG

Patterns

After meeting the Lady and spending an evening in a small town with two wonderful women talking about life, love, religion, politics, etc. Fireboy was compelled to ask me about my patterns in dating as I drove him back to the city.

He wanted to know all about my dating past and patterns. Why did I date unavailable men and what I can do to consciously change as I move forward in the dating world. Maybe all I needed to do was think about what I was doing as I began dating someone new, or maybe try a dating service where I could meet single men in their 30s that are looking for a relationship now that they have established their careers.

Now, many many many people have tried to have this conversation with me. Most end up getting an earful from me essentially saying … don’t you think I would change these patterns if I could, or why do I have to be in a couple to be happy, or the classic, Who the hell do you think you are to tell me what to do in my dating life! But, as I was driving and knew that these words were somehow connected to his wonderful time in the small town and knowing that the reunion with the SSM was a short one, that he really does just want to see me happy and the fact that he had never tried to “convert” me to the couple way of life before I let him talk and didn’t say much at all.

I have now been home for almost three days and I have managed to slide back into all my old comfortable relationship patterns. Morning coffee with Roomie, emails and lunches with Awesome, two pints with GB, walking, coffee breaks with my favourite coworkers, emails with the Lady and so on. It is nice to be able to slide right back into my usual routine at home and at work, but it does get me to thinking I will continue with the dating pattern here at home? Unavailable men, blue eyed assholes, and so on. Probably, it is what I know and am as comfortable with that pattern as I am with the rest of them. I would hate to change any of my other patterns, so this bad one might just have to stick around for a while as I settle back into life.

Shh … don’t tell Fireboy.

TSG

ps. The regular pattern also includes more regular posting, so that's good.

Tomorrow ...

Tomorrow I have to step back into my old life and I am a bit nervous about it all. I know I will be fine – mostly because that is what everyone keeps telling me – but I really am a little scared and unsure of how it is all going to go. No need to reassure me, that isn’t what I am looking for. I just need to say it, and feel it, and breathe.

In and out, it is all I can really do.

Cross you fingers for me.

TSG