I couldn't do it

I was over at Awesome’s place last night watching a movie and some Gamily Guy episodes, and some snuggling, which seems to be our new routine when I am at his place. And as is our custom after a bit he said “I should get you home” and I told him I drove GB’s car over because I had been running late. “Really!” he responded and immediately stood up and took off his pants. “Umm what are you doing? What does me driving have to do with you having or not having pants on?” I inquired. “Well … If I don’t have to drive you home I can just get ready for bed” He replied as he crawled back into his bed in his underwear and t-shirt pulling the covers up over both of us. (I was fully clothed BTW.)

So I stayed for a bit and we snuggled and kissed. When the kissing started to get a little more serious, I couldn’t do it. I asked him to stop and if we could take a breather. He got up and grab us some water and we lied around and enjoyed pillow talk as only he and I can – Terminator 2, weaponry and buying lasers online – and then I went home.

I could have stayed, I know he wouldn’t have minded. He told me what time the alarm was set for and when I asked if I needed a permit for the street he said “No. Why are you going to stay all night?” Oh that and he offered last time I was there.

I knew I wouldn’t sleep well as I have been too stressed at work and the sexual tension would have driven me over the edge. And actually having sex, would have driven me to tears, not because it would be bad, but just because I am over tired and pretty emotionally raw this week – not an ideal situation for casual sex. But most of all I don’t think I could be with him because I know that the SSM will be here in a few days, and it sort of feels wrong when I know he is on his way to see me.

Weird eh? Well maybe not, but it felt a bit weird at the time.

The Single Girl