How I ended up here …

Rob from LIVE: in my living room writes (and I am paraphrasing); Ok, so most of your friends probably know this, but your periphery friends and blog followers may not: how did a small town girl who went to school in the big city end up - not just living, but living happily it would seem – away from the centre of the universe. I vote for that post ;-). It's like a "Choose your own blog-venture." I love it!

Ending up here was easy. I saw a great job for a company I liked that had a great reputation nationally, so I applied. One day after I emailed off my cv and cover letter my now boss emailed and offered me an interview. After the interview I thought, that went well I think I may have the job. And then I waited, and I waited, a whole month went by and I didn’t hear anything. Then one night while I was out playing bingo (first and last time) my cell phone rang and I was offered the job. Within four days I had completed the deal and I was preparing to move away from the centre of the universe.

I was very lucky when I decided to make the move because I already had some friends here (GB, CMG, Roomie and I had gone to school together back in the day). Actually when I found out I got the job I called Roomie to ask her if I could stay with her for a few weeks while I found my own place. She of course was more than happy to host me for however long it took me to find a home. Then two or three weeks later she called and said she and her boyfriend had broken up and would I consider living with her as she had an extra room and needed a roommate. “Of Course!” I said. Not only was she a great friend and a good roommate but deciding to live with her meant I wouldn’t have to find a place to live.

Being happy here was a much longer process. I have been here for now for just over two years and to be honest the first six months I wished for my old life back home. I spent hours on the phone with various friends and family keeping touch with them because I missed them and I wanted to make sure they didn’t forget me. I had moved but I hadn’t I was still clinging to what I knew and what I was comfortable with. I made some friends at work, hung with GB and CMG and met some of roomies friends. I went to parties, met people and tried to make a place for myself.

Changing cities as an adult is much different than when you go away to university. In university, everyone is new and looking to make new friends and have new experiences. When you are an adult people already have their friends, careers and lives so it can be slow to process integrating yourself.

Then one day it happened … I walked into one of my local bars (I currently have 3 locals if you were wondering), had some drinks with work friends and when it was time to leave I spent 10 minutes saying good bye to all the people I knew in the bar. That is when I started to realize this was my home, that it wasn’t just the place I lived. That began to make me happy. I also started doing different things. Living in a smaller city sometimes means there is less to do, but that has turned out to be a good thing as I do more instead of being apathetic and not doing anything at all.

Then I started branching out and meeting more people through my new found love of doing stuff. I took a lover (my first in a year) which boosted my self confidence, integrated myself into the workplace, quit smoking, started working out and just generally found a new place for me in the world.

It would be another year until I started the blog but in that year some adventures (should you choose to follow) included:

• My first kink night
• Dating and Dumping a speed addict
• The Speakeasy
• The tale of Fireboy
• My spontaneous trip to Orlando
• The whiniest boy ever
• The Karst
• The story that started the blog
  

And many other adventures …

All of the adventures I have had here have contributed to my happiness and I often wonder if I ever would have had any of them if I didn’t move away from my comfort zone. I still think about moving sometimes, but now instead of just thinking about moving back to the centre of the universe I often think about what other city I will live in next. I still spend hours and hours on the phone every week but now I don’t feel like I am missing out on everything, or that anyone will forget me tomorrow if I don’t call.

Thanks for the question Rob! I hope I have answered it to your satisfaction.

The Single Girl